Currently have military friends in town from the Island working for the next month while we have a huge 2010 city event in town. Upon their arrival they've informed me they have no country bars on the island and reeeeeeeaaalllllllllllllllyyyyyy wanted to go to one.
*Ugh*
I oblige and take them to a local hick bar. Cowboy hats are a plenty, girls acting like whores are more.
Although the people watching was an event and most entertaining in itself, I was surprised to see so many hot young men walk in the door, just about "last call" time.
*Sigh* If I could only be 27 yrs old again, those boys wouldn’t have a chance lol.
As we're being wrangled out the doors at the end of the night like cattle, some guy set up a smokie hotdog stand. BRILLIANT!!! Well at $6 a dog, he made a killing, but so worth it.
Whilst dressing my dog, some guy mentions to me that I won’t be kissing anyone as I stack on the sauerkraut and onions. Hahahahaha Before I could look up and say anything, he has tilted my head back and proceeds to lick me from the base of my neck to my temple! WTF?!
I politely smile, thank him and his friend for being gentleman like and excuse myself, finding my friends had watched the whole thing in horror watching, pointing and laughing.
A friend recapping the event, decided he must have been trying to re-enact the whole Good Will Hunting movie, where the characters are on a date and decide to get the kiss out of the way while they’re both chowing down on burgers with lots of onions etc.
Except he forgot a few important keys.
1) We were not on a date.
2) He never talked to me prior to licking me.
3) Never asked if I was game.
4) In the movie it was a kiss, not a full on neck – temple tongue assault.
Needless to say when I got home I scrubbed my face and neck from any drunken cooties he may have transferred… who knows who else he’d been licking earlier in the night?
Monday, January 25, 2010
Saturday, January 16, 2010
HAPPY 101 AWARD
The other day, The Naked Redhead nominated The Quixotic Jedi for a “Happy 101 Award” because she thought it was “hilarious to do so”. This is kind of like a blogger chain-email thingamabob (I think). TNR was nominated by Alex over at The Tell Tale Blog, and QJ was named in her post. I think pingbacks are supposed to be involved here, but who knows whose are disabled and whose aren’t? The Quixotic nominated me. YAY!
Anyway, here are the rules of engagement:
List 10 things that make you happy. Do at least one of them today. Tag 5 bloggers that brighten your day.
For those bloggers who get the award, you then link back to my blog and create your makes you happy list.
In no particular order, the following 10 things make me happy.
1. Sunny Days.
2. Coffee.
3. Writing.
4. Friendship/Unconditional Love.
5. Surfing/The Ocean..
6. Driving.
7. Independence.
8. Uncensored Laughing.
9. Friends that become Chosen Family.
10. Music.
1. Sunny days in Vancouver are precious. Whether it’s cold and a foot of snow on the ground, spring rains, or warm, there is something special about it that puts a spring in your step. Waking up slowing in the morning knowing that everyone outside your apartment is going to be in the same mood makes the days easier to deal with.
2. 6. (1) Coffee, Driving, Sunny days.– Enough said right? Not much more gets better with this combo unless its driving the strip to Long Beach, Tofino to go surfing.
3. Writing – I’ve been blogging for as long as I knew what a diary was. It was a way to vent and express myself without judgment. Writing about random things, sticking the Ipod in my ears, and losing myself in a heat of the moment, emotion thought that has to be written down right then! Some people run, hike, workout etc, as stress relievers, I write.
4. Friendship and unconditional - WIll try and articulate this another day.
5. Surfing/The Ocean - If you’ve never been to the ocean, and/or surfing, you’re missing something totally spiritual and magical.
Spiritual in the way that while you’re losing yourself in while watching the waves crash and slip back out, you’re free. The ocean doesn’t judge you, doesn’t compete with you, and the time that passes with the freedom is something else.
Look at the faces of anyone who’s just returned from holidays or spent a blissful day near water, the stress in their faces are gone and people look at peace and happy.
It is to be said with surfing. To sit on a board in the ocean with Mother Nature, waiting for her to send you a swell to pick you up and drive you into the shore. Or simply swallow you whole and force a saline cleanse on you, spit you out with a smile on her face while she fades back into the deep with a taunting whisper that says…..NEXT!
Either way, whatever you chose to do, sit on the beach or play red rover with the ocean, it’s not until you’re relaxing at the end of the day with that sun/wind kissed face and silently appreciate what peace is or could be.
6. Driving – Nothing beats an open road, music blasting, sun out… It’s simply peaceful.
7. Independence – I’ve never lived with a spouse. And although I would enjoy it, I also enjoy not having to answer to anyone, not cleaning anyone else’s mess.
And knowing being female, I’m strong and smart enough to do small repairs around my apt, fix my own car, plaster things if need be etc..
8. Uncensored Laughing – I love when something so unexpected makes me laugh so suddenly and hard from the belly. It’s the best, when in a world of forced politeness, some people are still capable of being true and letting go. It’s a very attractive thing to hear someone laugh like that.
9. Friends that become Chosen Family – After my folks passed away my siblings virtually become like strangers to me. They had absolutely no interest in keeping close. They went about their business and always seem annoyed that they had to deal with me. I was ashamed of them for their behaviour and embarrassed that maybe it was ME they didn’t like and were secretly having gatherings behind my back…. That was not the case and I learned my siblings are selfish people. My closest friends and their families opened their hearts and homes to me so I’ll never be alone again. They accept me for who I am, I can be myself, and that’s how it should be.
My friends are my chosen family and I wouldn’t have it any other way. I’ve learned much from them and their family dynamics.
10. Music – I love losing myself in music. All sorts. I wouldn’t say I have a type I like best; I let the music find my mood. With that I’ve learned to appreciate many different styles for the many different layers of my onion.
Below list of bloggers I’ve tagged that makes me happy.
The Quixotic – But he already tagged me..
http://www.quixoticjedi.com/
Red at The Naked RedHead
http://www.thenakedredhead.com/
Peter Shankman at Haro and Shankman.com
http://shankman.com/
Georgia at In the State I’m in
http://georgiaisyourfriend.blogspot.com/
Jesse Tucker at Making Music
http://jessetucker.squarespace.com/
**********************************************************************
and two one more for good measure
Jen Lancaster at Jennsylvania
http://www.jennsylvania.com/
Michele Hickford at Do I Need To Slap You?
Although she isn’t currently blogging, she’s an amazing woman who has changed
My life in many ways from her blog and book.
http://muleos.blogspot.com/
Anyway, here are the rules of engagement:
List 10 things that make you happy. Do at least one of them today. Tag 5 bloggers that brighten your day.
For those bloggers who get the award, you then link back to my blog and create your makes you happy list.
In no particular order, the following 10 things make me happy.
1. Sunny Days.
2. Coffee.
3. Writing.
4. Friendship/Unconditional Love.
5. Surfing/The Ocean..
6. Driving.
7. Independence.
8. Uncensored Laughing.
9. Friends that become Chosen Family.
10. Music.
1. Sunny days in Vancouver are precious. Whether it’s cold and a foot of snow on the ground, spring rains, or warm, there is something special about it that puts a spring in your step. Waking up slowing in the morning knowing that everyone outside your apartment is going to be in the same mood makes the days easier to deal with.
2. 6. (1) Coffee, Driving, Sunny days.– Enough said right? Not much more gets better with this combo unless its driving the strip to Long Beach, Tofino to go surfing.
3. Writing – I’ve been blogging for as long as I knew what a diary was. It was a way to vent and express myself without judgment. Writing about random things, sticking the Ipod in my ears, and losing myself in a heat of the moment, emotion thought that has to be written down right then! Some people run, hike, workout etc, as stress relievers, I write.
4. Friendship and unconditional - WIll try and articulate this another day.
5. Surfing/The Ocean - If you’ve never been to the ocean, and/or surfing, you’re missing something totally spiritual and magical.
Spiritual in the way that while you’re losing yourself in while watching the waves crash and slip back out, you’re free. The ocean doesn’t judge you, doesn’t compete with you, and the time that passes with the freedom is something else.
Look at the faces of anyone who’s just returned from holidays or spent a blissful day near water, the stress in their faces are gone and people look at peace and happy.
It is to be said with surfing. To sit on a board in the ocean with Mother Nature, waiting for her to send you a swell to pick you up and drive you into the shore. Or simply swallow you whole and force a saline cleanse on you, spit you out with a smile on her face while she fades back into the deep with a taunting whisper that says…..NEXT!
Either way, whatever you chose to do, sit on the beach or play red rover with the ocean, it’s not until you’re relaxing at the end of the day with that sun/wind kissed face and silently appreciate what peace is or could be.
6. Driving – Nothing beats an open road, music blasting, sun out… It’s simply peaceful.
7. Independence – I’ve never lived with a spouse. And although I would enjoy it, I also enjoy not having to answer to anyone, not cleaning anyone else’s mess.
And knowing being female, I’m strong and smart enough to do small repairs around my apt, fix my own car, plaster things if need be etc..
8. Uncensored Laughing – I love when something so unexpected makes me laugh so suddenly and hard from the belly. It’s the best, when in a world of forced politeness, some people are still capable of being true and letting go. It’s a very attractive thing to hear someone laugh like that.
9. Friends that become Chosen Family – After my folks passed away my siblings virtually become like strangers to me. They had absolutely no interest in keeping close. They went about their business and always seem annoyed that they had to deal with me. I was ashamed of them for their behaviour and embarrassed that maybe it was ME they didn’t like and were secretly having gatherings behind my back…. That was not the case and I learned my siblings are selfish people. My closest friends and their families opened their hearts and homes to me so I’ll never be alone again. They accept me for who I am, I can be myself, and that’s how it should be.
My friends are my chosen family and I wouldn’t have it any other way. I’ve learned much from them and their family dynamics.
10. Music – I love losing myself in music. All sorts. I wouldn’t say I have a type I like best; I let the music find my mood. With that I’ve learned to appreciate many different styles for the many different layers of my onion.
Below list of bloggers I’ve tagged that makes me happy.
The Quixotic – But he already tagged me..
http://www.quixoticjedi.com/
Red at The Naked RedHead
http://www.thenakedredhead.com/
Peter Shankman at Haro and Shankman.com
http://shankman.com/
Georgia at In the State I’m in
http://georgiaisyourfriend.blogspot.com/
Jesse Tucker at Making Music
http://jessetucker.squarespace.com/
**********************************************************************
and two one more for good measure
Jen Lancaster at Jennsylvania
http://www.jennsylvania.com/
Michele Hickford at Do I Need To Slap You?
Although she isn’t currently blogging, she’s an amazing woman who has changed
My life in many ways from her blog and book.
http://muleos.blogspot.com/
Friday, January 8, 2010
8 days into 2010 has proven to be to be a positive start compared to last year.
8 days into 2009 I had already had two dates from hell. A roommate that was shadey, friends even worse.
Everyday in 2010 has been different for me. I'm not a morning person, ever, nor do I ever fake it.
As of lately, I've been waking up in a decent mood, pleasant even. *gasp*
I'm still sensitive to the cold, but have been finding it most relaxing to walk about (bundled up of course) with the cold air on my face and quite enjoying it.
Although my body feels like that of an 80yr old, my mind is energetic, and I really hope my body allows me to play along. I've been stretching, will start going to the gym, cos I really do not like the aches and pains my body has endured in the last two years as a result of hurting my back.
There are times when I'm sitting and NOTHING hurts, no aches, nothing.... and I think, cool lets go snowboarding! Then I get up to do something and walking hurts some days.
I think it would be safe to say I'll be going to physio this year, instead of the chiropractor as my recovery.
I love the chiropractor, however stopped going about 6 sessions into, when I started becoming tighter and losing the flexibility I had.
Friends and men have improved. I'm not dwelling on those who do no make me happy, and until recently, hadn't thought about the man I stopped seeing forever. (I only thought of him cos someone asked me about the situation)
Friends of the past have either stepped up or stepped off. For those who chose to step off. So be it.
Not bitter, sad, angry, only indifferent. What catches me off guard a little, is how little effort on my part it seems to take to move on.
I'm normally one to fight to the bitter end to try and make a friendship or romantic relationship work. This year, letting it/them all go without much dwelling or effort. Learned to let go at some point. FINALLY!
I've seen how much growth I've earned over the years, usually only when I look back to where I was and where currently am. Never while it's happening. feeling free of drama and others negativities is an amazing feeling, and I highly recommend it to everyone.
Surrounding myself with great people. Although I might want to be your friend, and think you're great.... it may not be a compatiable fit. Nothing anyone can do about that.
If relationships on any level are not mutual, there is no point trying to force the friendship or romance with that person. Passing acquaintances or someone you spend only a small dose of time with.
You're not a priorty friend who gets the intimate details of my day to day life. Fair? I think so.
It's not meant to come across as rude, some relationships are meant to be short, long, etc, for whatever reason, (and I strongly believe in this) people come and go in and out of your life for a multitude of reasons. Hopefully we learn what those reasons where.
I like who I've become in the past year, and although the jounrey may have sucked, I'm here now and I like ME (Don't "they" say, you have to like/love yourself first before someone else will?)
8 days into 2009 I had already had two dates from hell. A roommate that was shadey, friends even worse.
Everyday in 2010 has been different for me. I'm not a morning person, ever, nor do I ever fake it.
As of lately, I've been waking up in a decent mood, pleasant even. *gasp*
I'm still sensitive to the cold, but have been finding it most relaxing to walk about (bundled up of course) with the cold air on my face and quite enjoying it.
Although my body feels like that of an 80yr old, my mind is energetic, and I really hope my body allows me to play along. I've been stretching, will start going to the gym, cos I really do not like the aches and pains my body has endured in the last two years as a result of hurting my back.
There are times when I'm sitting and NOTHING hurts, no aches, nothing.... and I think, cool lets go snowboarding! Then I get up to do something and walking hurts some days.
I think it would be safe to say I'll be going to physio this year, instead of the chiropractor as my recovery.
I love the chiropractor, however stopped going about 6 sessions into, when I started becoming tighter and losing the flexibility I had.
Friends and men have improved. I'm not dwelling on those who do no make me happy, and until recently, hadn't thought about the man I stopped seeing forever. (I only thought of him cos someone asked me about the situation)
Friends of the past have either stepped up or stepped off. For those who chose to step off. So be it.
Not bitter, sad, angry, only indifferent. What catches me off guard a little, is how little effort on my part it seems to take to move on.
I'm normally one to fight to the bitter end to try and make a friendship or romantic relationship work. This year, letting it/them all go without much dwelling or effort. Learned to let go at some point. FINALLY!
I've seen how much growth I've earned over the years, usually only when I look back to where I was and where currently am. Never while it's happening. feeling free of drama and others negativities is an amazing feeling, and I highly recommend it to everyone.
Surrounding myself with great people. Although I might want to be your friend, and think you're great.... it may not be a compatiable fit. Nothing anyone can do about that.
If relationships on any level are not mutual, there is no point trying to force the friendship or romance with that person. Passing acquaintances or someone you spend only a small dose of time with.
You're not a priorty friend who gets the intimate details of my day to day life. Fair? I think so.
It's not meant to come across as rude, some relationships are meant to be short, long, etc, for whatever reason, (and I strongly believe in this) people come and go in and out of your life for a multitude of reasons. Hopefully we learn what those reasons where.
I like who I've become in the past year, and although the jounrey may have sucked, I'm here now and I like ME (Don't "they" say, you have to like/love yourself first before someone else will?)
Monday, January 4, 2010
Sticker Space for Rent on a Marketing Genius's MacPro Cover!
If you or anyone needs a creative way to advertise your product, blog, cd, media creative company etc....
Go check out my pal Peter Shankman's Blog.
http://shankman.com/
His entry speaks for itself.
Go check out my pal Peter Shankman's Blog.
http://shankman.com/
His entry speaks for itself.
Sunday, January 3, 2010
Reflections on an improved me. 2009
2009.
Most are glad to see it in the past, as am I. Although I wouldn’t change the things that happened. Fortunate the negative wasn’t worst, nonetheless, an eye opener for sure.
Taking a queue from The State That I Am In blog, I’m going to steal her style for writing about 2009 and keep it positive. http://georgiaisyourfriend.blogspot.com/
Had a handful of bad dates early on in 2009 and subconsciously decided not to try so hard to meet anyone knew until I understood more of what I wanted for myself.
I’m graduating to a different type of man. Ended an on/off again relationship with a man who has been there for me in the best ways and not in all “relationship” ways.
Healthiest move I’ve made for my love life ever. Although it hurts as the breaker upper, I’m going through the post breakup stages. I learned he is NOT the man for me.
I learned to let go.
Discovered the reality of the lack of obtainable employment, although I was only looking part-time, it proved to be futile, realizing it doesn’t matter how much education or experience you have, there are no jobs available with suitable pay.
Learned to be selfish in a positive way and redirected being a people pleaser to making myself happy first. With that, a few friendships turned into acquaintanceships. They may be great people, but not necessarily friends I need to make a priority. Learned to let my guard down and let men like me with one simple sentence from a random msn pal.“Over confidence from insecurities is a major turn off.”
I’m overly independent, and don’t let many help me, or even just be men….
That sentence alone changed how I behave towards men.
Made a list of 40 things to do before 40, thanks to the talented and amazing Naked RedHead. http://www.thenakedredhead.com/ Some forcing me to be more proactive about my longevity and health, to step outside my comfort zone on so many different levels. And since I put it on the Internet I’ll have to follow thru. Not all will be a success, but I will have tried.
Was provoked to think, improve writing styles, challenges, and entertained with a few new blogs.
My best friend taught me about courage when she finally left an abusive relationship. Currently living with me and witnessing first hand the turmoil, abusive mind games she’s had to endure for the last decade, again opened my eyes to the evils in the world and just how naïve I am capable of being at times. Hard to learn to be trusting of others when so much garbage is out there. Weary, yes. Stupid, no.
I had more unnecessary hangovers than required. Relearned my limit.
Went out to more invited gigs and events I normally would have. Discovered a new group of people I enjoy being around and we’re slowing building our rapports from pubs friends to “friends”.
Built way more character than I needed, and learned I’m stronger and more emotional in certain areas of my life. Two friends went over seas on duty tour to help bring wars to an end. Both returned safe and sound.
Spent every single major holiday alone. ALONE 100%, not because I’m not loved or have no friends. Plans just didn’t pan out. Never again will I spend a holiday alone weeping about it (okay maybe a bit) but I’ll do it doing something that makes me happy at the same time.
I’ve entered 2010 with an internal positive motivation than I thought possible.
It’s almost like I have no control over it, or just want a change I’ve invoked a better outlook.
I haven’t always found it easy to be outwardly positive all the time, it’s exhausting.
Somehow it’s in my head now to “just do it” attitude.
I feel most beautiful when I’m laughing with my friends.
I’m excitingly looking forward to 2010 and all it’s challenges and adventures it will bring me.
Most are glad to see it in the past, as am I. Although I wouldn’t change the things that happened. Fortunate the negative wasn’t worst, nonetheless, an eye opener for sure.
Taking a queue from The State That I Am In blog, I’m going to steal her style for writing about 2009 and keep it positive. http://georgiaisyourfriend.blogspot.com/
Had a handful of bad dates early on in 2009 and subconsciously decided not to try so hard to meet anyone knew until I understood more of what I wanted for myself.
I’m graduating to a different type of man. Ended an on/off again relationship with a man who has been there for me in the best ways and not in all “relationship” ways.
Healthiest move I’ve made for my love life ever. Although it hurts as the breaker upper, I’m going through the post breakup stages. I learned he is NOT the man for me.
I learned to let go.
Discovered the reality of the lack of obtainable employment, although I was only looking part-time, it proved to be futile, realizing it doesn’t matter how much education or experience you have, there are no jobs available with suitable pay.
Learned to be selfish in a positive way and redirected being a people pleaser to making myself happy first. With that, a few friendships turned into acquaintanceships. They may be great people, but not necessarily friends I need to make a priority. Learned to let my guard down and let men like me with one simple sentence from a random msn pal.“Over confidence from insecurities is a major turn off.”
I’m overly independent, and don’t let many help me, or even just be men….
That sentence alone changed how I behave towards men.
Made a list of 40 things to do before 40, thanks to the talented and amazing Naked RedHead. http://www.thenakedredhead.com/ Some forcing me to be more proactive about my longevity and health, to step outside my comfort zone on so many different levels. And since I put it on the Internet I’ll have to follow thru. Not all will be a success, but I will have tried.
Was provoked to think, improve writing styles, challenges, and entertained with a few new blogs.
My best friend taught me about courage when she finally left an abusive relationship. Currently living with me and witnessing first hand the turmoil, abusive mind games she’s had to endure for the last decade, again opened my eyes to the evils in the world and just how naïve I am capable of being at times. Hard to learn to be trusting of others when so much garbage is out there. Weary, yes. Stupid, no.
I had more unnecessary hangovers than required. Relearned my limit.
Went out to more invited gigs and events I normally would have. Discovered a new group of people I enjoy being around and we’re slowing building our rapports from pubs friends to “friends”.
Built way more character than I needed, and learned I’m stronger and more emotional in certain areas of my life. Two friends went over seas on duty tour to help bring wars to an end. Both returned safe and sound.
Spent every single major holiday alone. ALONE 100%, not because I’m not loved or have no friends. Plans just didn’t pan out. Never again will I spend a holiday alone weeping about it (okay maybe a bit) but I’ll do it doing something that makes me happy at the same time.
I’ve entered 2010 with an internal positive motivation than I thought possible.
It’s almost like I have no control over it, or just want a change I’ve invoked a better outlook.
I haven’t always found it easy to be outwardly positive all the time, it’s exhausting.
Somehow it’s in my head now to “just do it” attitude.
I feel most beautiful when I’m laughing with my friends.
I’m excitingly looking forward to 2010 and all it’s challenges and adventures it will bring me.
Monday, December 21, 2009
2010 is all about ME
How selfish am I going to be in the following year? So selfish, I'm only doing things for ME, no one else.
That will be hard in itself cos I'm firecly loyal to my friends and helping them when I can.
A few things have triggered this turn of events.
This will be my second christmas alone, only to learn that the family I usually spend it with is actually going to be in town this year and no one bothered to inform me until it was too late, and I can not attend due to my finances being allocated elsewhere already.
Broke up with D after a 13 yr on/off again relationship that had no future.
Tired of people coming or calling on me, only when they need something.
Christmas is hard enough as it is, without feeling like an after thought.
I'm not looking for pity or to be invited anywhere. If it was meant to be, it would have happened naturally.
It didnt.
2010 moving forward I will do things that make me happy and not worry about inviting others.
Christmas next year will be spent on the island surfing. Maybe alone, but I'll be happy.
Going to date who I want under my terms, not worry about what my friends think, cos I'm the one dating him, not them. All input will be heard and considered but in no way will influence me like it has in the past
(you can't date him, his job sucks, he's too short, too tall, in the wrong field, too good looking, not handsome enough).... yes I've had to deal with that kind of input.
Maybe it's the season getting to me, but I'm really just exhausted making sure everyone else is happy and has a way to get to where ever with whomever, and then being neglected myself.
By my own doing or someone elses.
It's another rambling rant. It's how I feel.
I will do what I want come the new year (without being a bitch) if you fit into my plans, lucky you.
Others that don't naturally fit, will just be forgotten by the wayside.
No point keeping people around if you have to work at it having them as a friend in the first place.
Actions speak louder than words.
That will be hard in itself cos I'm firecly loyal to my friends and helping them when I can.
A few things have triggered this turn of events.
This will be my second christmas alone, only to learn that the family I usually spend it with is actually going to be in town this year and no one bothered to inform me until it was too late, and I can not attend due to my finances being allocated elsewhere already.
Broke up with D after a 13 yr on/off again relationship that had no future.
Tired of people coming or calling on me, only when they need something.
Christmas is hard enough as it is, without feeling like an after thought.
I'm not looking for pity or to be invited anywhere. If it was meant to be, it would have happened naturally.
It didnt.
2010 moving forward I will do things that make me happy and not worry about inviting others.
Christmas next year will be spent on the island surfing. Maybe alone, but I'll be happy.
Going to date who I want under my terms, not worry about what my friends think, cos I'm the one dating him, not them. All input will be heard and considered but in no way will influence me like it has in the past
(you can't date him, his job sucks, he's too short, too tall, in the wrong field, too good looking, not handsome enough).... yes I've had to deal with that kind of input.
Maybe it's the season getting to me, but I'm really just exhausted making sure everyone else is happy and has a way to get to where ever with whomever, and then being neglected myself.
By my own doing or someone elses.
It's another rambling rant. It's how I feel.
I will do what I want come the new year (without being a bitch) if you fit into my plans, lucky you.
Others that don't naturally fit, will just be forgotten by the wayside.
No point keeping people around if you have to work at it having them as a friend in the first place.
Actions speak louder than words.
Monday, December 7, 2009
Saying goodbye to a relationship & Fresh Starts.....
This weekend has been anything that I thought it would.
I witness the sociopath on speaker phone as he yelled at my friend over things that werent revelant at 2am. When he did not get the answer he wanted, he called her all sorts of names.
That was one phone call I hear directly. If ANYONE had ever talked to me that way, ever, I would have walked away then. She put in 13 years. Strongest woman I've ever known in my life time so far.
Saturday I ended a 12 year relationship with a man I was having stronger feelings for. Our arrangement no longer works for me, and on my list of things to do, "love freely without fear of being hurt" is on it.
He honestly couldn't be surprised I became attached, it's only been 13 years.
It went exactly how I anticipated it would. He wasnt an asshole or malicious with my feelings.
I made it clear what I was feeling & wanted, and so did he. Simply, we do not want the same things.
(which I knew and more reason I had to do this) I was never going to be part of his future. Never.
Ouch.
We will not be seeing or talking to each other for the next few weeks to months. We will be friends in the end, just not right now. I need some time to adjust, permission to grieve and let it go.
I'm proud of myself for following through and ending a relationship that was holding me back from letting love in as a whole and will be available to give love as a whole.
As much as it hurt, this was the healthiest thing I've done for my romantic life, in oh, I dont know, 13 years.
I witness the sociopath on speaker phone as he yelled at my friend over things that werent revelant at 2am. When he did not get the answer he wanted, he called her all sorts of names.
That was one phone call I hear directly. If ANYONE had ever talked to me that way, ever, I would have walked away then. She put in 13 years. Strongest woman I've ever known in my life time so far.
Saturday I ended a 12 year relationship with a man I was having stronger feelings for. Our arrangement no longer works for me, and on my list of things to do, "love freely without fear of being hurt" is on it.
He honestly couldn't be surprised I became attached, it's only been 13 years.
It went exactly how I anticipated it would. He wasnt an asshole or malicious with my feelings.
I made it clear what I was feeling & wanted, and so did he. Simply, we do not want the same things.
(which I knew and more reason I had to do this) I was never going to be part of his future. Never.
Ouch.
We will not be seeing or talking to each other for the next few weeks to months. We will be friends in the end, just not right now. I need some time to adjust, permission to grieve and let it go.
I'm proud of myself for following through and ending a relationship that was holding me back from letting love in as a whole and will be available to give love as a whole.
As much as it hurt, this was the healthiest thing I've done for my romantic life, in oh, I dont know, 13 years.
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